Narcissism 101
Spot the Signs of Narcissism
When I was still in high school, I was already aware of the man called Narcissus. He loved himself so much and was pretty vain. And back then, I only associated narcissism with vanity. Little did I know that too much of it is already a disorder and there are signs of narcissism that I overlooked in my narcissistic mother.
Recognizing Narcissism
According to Barends Psychology*, a person with narcissism or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) can “ask for attention by boasting about their achievements or by pretending to be very sick or hurt in a dramatic way.” They appear to be strong and confident while they boast, but they are also very weak and almost pathetic while they play the victim.
At home, we have recognized the above signs in my mother while my brother and I were growing up. However, my brother and I never really got to discuss this as my mother has successful alienated us. It seemed that she was trying to drive a wedge to whoever was getting close to me.
Important Note
The author, Lilac Rose, has been a victim of emotional abuse from her narcissistic mother and empath of a father for 43 years before recognizing it. If you don’t have helpful or encouraging comments, please refrain from commenting derogatory against her. This is the author’s journey to self-love and regaining self-esteem. Since this blog is anonymous, this is a safe haven for her that this will not reach her parents.
Click page 2 for the Signs of Narcissism
17 COMMENTS
I guess that for the children a little narcissism is essential for the constitution of its personality but not for the older ones because it becomes a psychological problem
These are some great tips to help spot a narcissist. I think we all need to be aware of their traits and how to stop suffering under their hands.
Man, those details are quite haunting. To the point that I look to myself really.
Narcissists are so destructive. Thanks for this, sometimes it’s not obvious right away but when you look closely at someone’s behavior and realize how destructive they are, it’s hard to stand up for yourself and eliminate them from your life.
Over a period of time, very people are now able to know the actual meaning of narcissism. This post is good to make awareness to the readers. My friend’s dad is narcissist and he would never agree for the treatment. Whereas my other friend considers the narcissist word is just a funny thing.
Narcissism, posed and controlled, sometimes is also a dose of selfishness that we need, but not when it turns us into Narcissus.
Exactly. We do need to a love ourselves.
I’m so sorry you had to live through a life with a narcissistic mom, I can only imagine how utterly difficult and sad it must have been, but it’s never too late. I wish you well and I hope that you’ll be a better person because of all the things you had to go through growing up.
Being a psychologist I’ll say these are good points. However, these are mixed signs of psychopathy too.
yep, we have one in our family and its the worst when were all together!
Unfortunately, from what I’ve experienced, many of those who do have narcissistic tendencies have them because of their life beforehand. Ex: A woman grew up in a house where she was the only daughter. There were three sons, two before her and one after. She and her family lived on a farm and her mother would say from time to time how she would have liked the daughter to be another boy so they could have more help. The daughter constantly tries to win the approval of the mother, but never gets it. So when she has her own family, she loves the attention she gets because she’s finally getting it. Then her husband cheats on her and creates a new family. Now she gets the negative attention from friends, “Oh, I’m so sorry! You poor dear!” She likes that negative attention, too because it’s still attention. So she starts to create drama whenever she doesn’t feel appreciated.
It sucks, unfortunately and it makes a pattern for their children until someone breaks the pattern.
Oh my gosh Brittany. That’s a vicious cycle! 🙁
I am so sorry you had to go through that! It is becoming easier to get the information to see if you are dealing with a narcissist but it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with them, does it? I am glad you are taking steps to protect yourselves now!
Yes, Dominique. Especially for my kids. My mother doesn’t see them as grandchildren but as competition. 🙁
I feel like narcissism is being talked about a lot more these days for various reasons. It’s kind of scary to think there are people like this running the world.
Sounds like my mother. Look, don’t feel bad that it took so long to recognize that your mother is narcissistic. Took me about the same time as well. I realized it when I was around 32. She had caused me to have anxiety and panic attacks, which is one of the reasons why I left the state with my then boyfriend now husband. Afterwards, I realized something was wrong with her but still didn’t know it was narcissism. I didn’t realize that until I learned more about it, around 32 years old. So now, I love from afar. Don’t let her manipulate me. And keep my visits significantly short.
Oh wow this is a good read! I wonder if I know any lol