Everyday, Filipinos see news about a family and their business squabble. A large bus liner and its subsidiaries are at stake. People have developed factions and even friends fight against each other in the midst of the heated situation. So what is your conclusion on their family problems? Whose side are you on?

Family Problems and Warring Factions

Much like a Manny Pacquiao boxing match, people have taken sides. This feud has extended to the relatives, employees, contractors, suppliers, media, and most of the all, the masses and the riding public. And pretty much everyone has an opinion, a conclusion, or heck, judgments about the whole situation and the individual personas involved.

The warring factions may be clearly divided into two. Team One is composed of the mom and two children. Meanwhile, Team Two is composed of supposedly irreverent and estranged children who have teamed up to fight against their mom. The issue is their shares of stocks and control of the company.

Both teams are fighting for what they believe is right. Cases have been filed in court. And the people are having a picnic following the daily developments of this feud. Not only do their family problems affect the transport sector and the riding public, their employees’ jobs and futures are also riding in the balance.

Sympathy for the Mother

Since the hoopla broke out, much has been said to the the workers, the public, and the media. And probably as much as 90% are supporting the mom. A grieving widow loses control over the company that she has built with her husband. Family problems are growing out of control. And some of her children have turned their backs on her and maligning her in public.

She calls on unity, solidarity, fairness, and for the truth to come out. As I keep seeing on my news feeds, people keep sharing news articles, video clips, and the like, enclosing their own opinion. And more often than not, there is overwhelming sympathy for the mom who is shown as an emotional wreck.

The Unruly Children

On the other side of the fence are the children who are portrayed as the villains in this family saga. People, even those who have no direct connection to them, have called them names. Their family problems are fodder in neighborhood kapihan, barbershops, and sari-sari stores.

This story has become more interesting than Cardo and Judy Ann combined.

Whatever the children do or say, it seems, are just merely thrown back at them at crushing magnitude.

The Benefit of the Doubt

My opinion does not really matter. I am not part of the family nor do I have stakes in their company. However, because of the recent happenings with my narcissistic mother, I have come to many realizations in my life.

If this fiasco broke out a couple of years ago, I would also have easily sided with the mom. But because of my own estranged relationship with my mother and the emotional abuses I have experienced, I can give the benefit of the doubt to the children in this case.

We are not privy to what happens behind closed doors. Except for the family members themselves, we haven’t seen how these children have grown up while the parents built their billion-peso business empire.

So all I am saying is that, let’s calm down and let the judges in court decide on the case. There’s really not much use with mudslinging and judgments made online or by word of mouth. We are just fueling the hate and the negativity without even knowing the real story. The invective, insults, and conclusions hurled around by people are gagging enough.

This much I can say, we cannot believe everything we see on the internet. Not everything that is reported may be complete. Some facts may be true but if these are reported in fragments, the whole truth becomes affected. I know so because that’s how my mother manipulates people’s opinion of me.

Effects of Social Media

Social media is a nice tool to connect people. However, it can also be used as a tool to tear people down. Recently, we watched John Denver Trending, an Indie film that’s part of Cinemalaya 2019.

John Denver is a young boy from Antique whose life changed when a video of him brutally beating another boy became viral. But that was just one side of the story. He beat the boy because he was humiliated several times and then his bag was taken because he was suspected of stealing a gadget.

But because social media shares are lighting fast, people young and old have made their own conclusions. John Denver was berated online and offline, called names, while memes about him spread like wildfire. Assumptions about his personality, childhood, and other family were under scrutiny. Needless to say, his life was turned upside down. And not for the better. But I will not tell you the ending. Watch the movie and learn from it, too.

His story tells us that we cannot believe all that is shared online. This has happened many times. People get cyberbullied even if only one side has been known. These people are still humans and they get hurt. Let’s be responsible with out social media use. It’s a powerful tool to build and destroy in the click of a finger.

The Conclusion

How will this end? Will the warring family reconcile and the erring party make amends? I honestly don’t know. The courts can decide on the cases filed. If ever, the business can go on as long as systems are in place.

As for the family relationships, the dynamics are far different and more complicated. Only God knows how this will turn out in the end. Family problems and court cases are indeed messy.

Forgiveness and Reconciliation

In my case, I have forgiven my mother but have begged off on the reconciliation part. While I have released my bitterness and accepted the fact that she won’t change, reconciliation is an entirely different matter. We both exist and I still lover her, but from afar.

This distance is not because I am disrespectful or I have lost my love or I don’t have gratitude. This is to protect myself because once I have reconciled with her, the emotional abuse will happen again. I know because this vicious cycle has happened throughout my life. So I am loving her from afar because I don’t think I can handle the stress anymore.

Right now, I am taking antidepressants to manage my anxiety and depression. Life has been easier because the tension has been relieved. I am more focused and I am better at making decisions and prioritizing tasks. Most of all, I have a more even temperament, which has made my children and husband happier.

Thankfully, my case is much easier to solve as I don’t have an inheritance to fight for. We don’t have assets to divide nor employees to stress over. My parents have properties but they can keep it. Hubby and I can work for our and our children’s future. God and our faith gives us strength.

Now, I am much happier and fulfilled. I can only wish the same for this other family.